The first decade is the hardest

Excuse me for not writing for a while - it has been a whirlwind of cake making, Fete preparation

My stall at the Fete in the Park last week

.........and sleepover management in the Welch household over the last few weeks!

First of all - a quick look at the couple of cakes I promised you in my last post.  The Wedding cake.....

 

A three tier, cheerfully colourful cake, draped in bunting and topped with it's very own tea party!

 
The little mouse on the top was a special addition requested by the happy couple to represent their son, cheekily chomping on a sugar cube - as he apparently loves to do when visiting cafes!  In my book, anything can be meaningful, and it was important to me that the grooms cup, held the bride's cup, holding the little boy's mouse - a picture of family in tea party form!

And, yes, I did indeed maintain the general stickiness for one more week and make an Olympics Themed cake to raffle for Children on the Edge and I am sooooo chuffed to report that it raised an amazing £400.  Thank you so much to everyone who took part in the fund raising.  The generous donations you contributed will go to COTE's work in one of their many projects with marginalised and vulnerable children across the world.  It will make a difference.  You have made a difference.

You may not be surprised to know that I was relieved when eldest son announced that what he would most like for his birthday cake was a good old fashioned chocolate cake, which he wanted to smother in sweets himself.  Oh, the joy of simplicity.  He has been itching to use the chocolate cake recipe from the Roald Dahl book he was given for being ring bearer at our friends' wedding last year and could I deny him?  Yummy.  Delumptious, even.

 

Can you spy that naughty hubby eagerly waiting, fork in hand?

After a very wet adventure in the nearby river, his guests were treated to Mexican wraps around the fire and a night under canvas in our garden.  we filled their tents with those brilliant light up balloons you can get now and I made each of the guests their own sleep over pillow, roughly based on this tutorial.  This is such a neat idea; each pillow has a zip up pocket, to store you Pyjamas, book or midnight feast in and a handle to carry it with across that field after and evening round the camp fire!

 

They loved them, especially as the pocket was filled with sweets.  Well, he's too old for party bags....but I'm not!

So, even after a 5.50am wake up for us (and our neighbours) the whole thing went OK and they are now all back in their beds.  Phew!

These are the girls' versions of the pillows....so lovely to make something that could work for both boys and girls and to use some of my lovely vintage fabric for something that will be used again and again and hopefully be part of making new memories.

One decade ago we began this adventure of family by bringing into the world our precious first son.  Since then, we've brought 4 more into this world (the youngest of whom is stubbornly sitting on my lap as I type - refusing to succumb to sleep!)  The thoughts and feelings I have around this are probably too profound to put into words here, although I wish I could.  It's been an amazing 10 years, of growing, changing, challenging, discovering, learning to love more, learning to let go more, finding balance, seeking stability, yearning for peace (!), embracing the chaos, creating the order, searching for better ways, kinder ways, softer ways, more honest ways, working hard, playing lots, laughing often, crying sometimes, loving always.  It has been an honour to be mum to these boys so far.  I am honoured.

Eldest and youngest.

And Reu has finally fallen asleep on my lap, so I'd better transport him to bed.  Good night. xx

Cakes galore!

Just stopping by for 10 minutes (I must be strict this morning as I have a heap of stuff to do), to tell you about some things I've been working on.  I usually try to start work for the day in time for Woman's Hour at 10am - it gives me enought time to deposit various children to various places and whizz round with the hoover.....alhtough this morning my lovely husband has done that job.  Hence the 10 minutes!

This month is all about CAKES!  So far I have delivered a 30th birthday cake to a very happy mum, looking forward to treating her daughter to champagne today.  The family have two black labradors; mother and daughter and apparently the younger dog is cheeky and mischevious and loves to chase blackbirds in the park, whilst mummy dog looks on in disdain! 

Hopefully I have captured the different characters. 

I hope they have a wonderful day today.

Next on the list is a surprize, so I can't tell you about that one yet....
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Next week I am working on a Wedding cake - a four tier affair with intricate details and a fun colour theme - again - I'll have to show and tell that after the Big Day!

These are some beautiful poppies in my mum's garden - aren't they gorgeous?!

The week after that is The Fete in the Park at which I am holding a stall, selling my stuff.  Now, I may be slightly mad to even think of this idea - but I saw a poster yesterday for a Sports themed cake competition.  "Hmmmm," I thought, "Should I just extend the period of stickiness in the kitchen for a week or so longer?"  The thought has kind of gripped me now, and I'm really bad at not doing things once I've had the idea.  My thinking was, what if I did an Olympics themed cake and auctioned it to raise a bit of money for Children on the Edge?  The Olympic Torch is coming through Petworth a couple of days after the Fete, so it would be the perfect Party centrepiece.  The idea is a hot one.

Last year, I auctioned one of my dolls for this brilliant charity and it's such a fantastic cause.  What do you think?  Am I one step away from madness?
Oh, it's aslo Cadan's 10th birthday the week after that.....but, hey, I'll be on a roll by then!
So, this morning's task is a bag commission and I can hear the news on the radio starting, so I'd better get on.

Aaaaah, so lovely to have a morning in the house without children.....just for a bit! xxx

Give me your hands, if we be friends....

Nobody really tells you that the most exhausting bit of parenthood is not the sleepless nights, smelly nappies, taxi runs and constant tidying up job....oh, no - that's just the beginning.  The real hard work is in the emotional shaping and nurturing of a child and the way you feel every minute of it with them.  This week has been much like any other, with a few Mummery moments thrown in and my heart has been tested and squeezed by those ever growing boys of mine.

My family moved from Yorkshire to Sussex when I was 9 and I left behind  a lovely, sweet friend called Zoe.  I went through a really tough time in the next few school I was in as my family gradually settled into life "Down South".  I have a large "Port wine" birthmark on my left cheek which was significanly brighter when I was a child. Added to my very peculiar accent, this made me the perfect target for bullying.  I was thoroughly miserable for the 6 months I was at my first Southern school - being called all sorts of horrible names and spending most break times on my own, frantically writing down how I felt so that I could relay it to my mum when I got home; a kind of comfort blanket tactic.  I must have looked as odd as I sounded!  Things improved a little in my next school, but then the time came for "Big school" and after a family holiday booked in the first two weeks of term (NEVER do this to your children, please!) I found myself in a school where everybody seemed to have already made their friends and found their way round this terrifying complex of buildings.  I threw myself into working as hard as I could.

 

There is a reason I'm giving you this story of my life!  I've been having lots of conversations with my eldest boys recently about friendship and confidence and compassion and all those other things that go into growing up into a world worthy person.  I found myself telling number 2 son my story the other day - partly because I wanted him to know that others (even his mum) had been there before him on this well trodden path, but also because I wanted him to know that you do get through it and you are a better, more rounded, more compassionate and loving person.....not despite of it, but because of it.  I reckon a lot of the resilience I have now is thanks to the girls who pushed me over in the hall as I was waiting for lessons.  I think the empathy I can feel for others who are hurting is due to those boys who called me foul names.  I believe I am able to see things through to the end and work hard now, partly because I was branded the "school creep" and "Teacher's pet".  It was horribly tough at the time and I know I cried myself to sleep many Sunday nights.  I felt battered and bruised emotionally and remember feeling like I was someone very strange not to see the world the way these ever so confident people did.  Because they did seem ever so confident......

It's harder still when you are coaching your own child through the rigours of institutional education, which I have a definite love/hate relationship with at the best of times.  I would go through it all again rather than them if I could.  You just can't know as a child that these things are not only temporary, but are usually the product of someone else's unhappiness and self doubt.  I know in my heart though that they will be OK, because the message they get here is "You are loved, you are special, you are amazing and unique and you are watched over, every minute of the day." 

 

One of my deepest hopes for all my 5 boys is that they receive the precious gift I did when I was at school - a faithful friend.  A few weeks into this horror, I met two friends, one of whom is still my "soul mate" friend, who I don't have to talk to for months, but will know how I am feeling after the first "hello".  Knowing that you have one person who will know your heart - know who you are inside and who you can trust utterly is the most precious gift you could ever be given.

My other deep hope is that they take these experiences and absorb them into their personalities, like food for the soul, one day becoming fine young men who are confident enough in who they are not to stick up for themselves - because that's easy with a bit of bluster and attitude - but to stick up for others.  That's where the real bravery lies.

P.S. The photos have nothing to do with the post, I just thought I'd show you some of my pretty rain covered flowers and a few things I've been making.....because that would be better to look at than pictures of me as a 9 year old....

Mad May Round up # II

It's been another busy weekend in the Welch household.  This is our "Birthday season", in which we celebrate 3 sons' birthdays in the space of 6 weeks! 
It's lovely - but I look at a post from this time last year and wonder how I ever managed to fit in decorating for a wedding and making a wedding cake! (Mad May roundup).

 
Thankfully the sun has shone on us this last week and Ben was able to have his Lego themed birthday party out in the garden, under a hastily erected piece of camouflage tarp for shade.

I love making their cakes, if I have enough time not to get too stressed and as this year, my lovely mum took the remaining children off my hands for the day on Friday, I was able to be quite relaxed about it.  I'm learning to be a bit more like this with birthdays.  I always have about 3 times the number of ideas as I can fulfil at these times, so I have to be realistic with myself and learn not to be disappointed if I don't get to do them.  After all - they never knew these things were even being planned, and to be honest, are more than happy with having friends over and a special cake.  With 5 children, I try to give them one day a year that is just about them, and let their creativity run loose a bit too.  If it's a Lego Chewbacca cake they want, then off to Pinterest I go.  (Trouble is, you find so many more things there you want to have a go at!)

The garden is blossoming too and Jonny's new fire pit has been christened with a meal of Mexican wraps for the birthday boy, who managed to fit in a 5.30 pm trip to the doctors for some urgent asthma attention in the middle of it all too. 

 

Yes, that is an old trug basket burning on the fire....I too was concerned when I saw this - but after Jonny told me he had found it under a bush, rotten and beyond repair and that he thought it was kind of appropriate that the fire pit built from Dad's old Truggery was lit for the first time with one of his baskets, I felt better and actually thought how beautiful the moment was.  Dad would have loved it.
The decision to forget veg and go with flowers is paying off now too and the new border is blooming marvellously. 

I am so pleased I can hardly stop smiling when I walk out there and although today my favourite chair is covered in folded washing - it looks increasingly at home in our little patch.  Jonny lifted this chair out of a rubbish heap behind his house when we were teenagers after my insistence that it was beautiful and could be restored....it had no wooden slats and was covered in rust, but I could see potential!  It took me the next10 years or so to get round to stripping the old paint and cleaning it with a wire brush - after a promise from my dad that he would make new slats for me if I did.  I didn't get round to painting it, and unfortunately, Dad never got the chance to finish it for me.  Imagine how touched and emotional I felt this Christmas when my older brother presented it back to me after sneaking it away from my mum's house - fully restored and ready to be sat in!  It's a gift that so special, because it's not just about the time and skills that went into it, but about the skills passed on from my Dad and the honour it does his memory.

I have tidied my studio this morning, all ready for a new burst of creativity.  June is my month for Redeem to get going.  I keep telling myself!  Trouble is, my brain is suffering from a touch of "too many directions".  But I'm trying to go easy on it and let it settle a while!  It can easily become a race to try to "do something creative" while I have a minute without children, which ends in frustration, because you can't force these things. 

 Well, I hope you too are enjoying the sunshine.  I'm off to clear that chair off and have a cup of tea and a ponder.....

XXXXXXX

Making Memories

 
Some memories just happen.  Others have to be made.

Another wonderful inheritance I received from my Dad is the importance of doing this and the huge catalogue of memories I have from growing up.  We were always encouraged to experience life - touch, taste, smell, feel - grasp it with both hands.

This is why we ended up hurling ourselves into rivers in Yorkshire in small inflatables and being thrown over rapids, spluttering with exhilaration.  This is why we dug holes in the fields behind our garden and camped out in them.  This is why mum and dad woke us up again way after bedtime because it had snowed and ran laughing into the park opposite our house as a family, tumbling and falling in the deep, glistening whiteness. This is why we turned our hands yellow from picking hundreds of dandelions for Dad's wine. This is why Dad built ram shackled tents from wood and tarpaulin to house "Midsummer Nights Eve" parties, stringing wild flowers and fairy lights in the dusky evening air.

 Sometimes if you don't just do it - do something, the moment is gone and it will never be given back to you. 
That's why last Sunday we packed a picnic (in a hurry!) and headed off for the sea.

The essentials for a Welch family trip of this kind are definitely spare clothes - a full set for each child - because the inevitable always happens and anyway, the fun is being able to let them wade and paddle unrestricted.

I love bundling them up again in fresh clothes and back into a warm car.  This time we stopped off for an ice cream at Whiteways on Bury Hill on the way back (because obviously, there are no icecreams at the beach!).  This provided ample opportunity for Jonny to inspect every motorbike of the possibly 100 or more that were parked up.  The boys are beginning to appreciate this pass time too.  Memories.
I've also been pondering this week about the importance of objects in memories.  There are some objects that I can't ever remember being without - a candlestick holder that was my mum's - which I took for granted as part of the fabric of our home when I was little, but which is now mine, and has a newly appreciated beauty.

I love bringing it out for a special dinner - even though it is cracked and broken.  It's beautiful.
A row of wooden houses made by my Dad for me to paint.

I never painted them, but I love them as they are, lined up along my mantelpiece as a little reminder of the lengths he would go to to support my creativity.
A crocheted blanket made for Reuben by my Sister-in-law.  One of the most special gifts anyone has ever given me - because of the love that went into creating it and the story it grew out of.  It marked a special time.

Love this photo of a very cross Reuben wrapped in his blanket!

Today I received, in the post a beautifully wrapped "Box of Sunshine" from a friend; filled to the brim with goodies to brighten my day.  Sometimes objects - things - can be just the pinprick of light you need!

Never underestimate the power of a random gift and never hesitate to go for it and give one - (even if you feel it's beyond the point your friendship is at).  Creative and thoughtful gifts, given with love are always in order.

Lastly, I had the pleasure of finishing the patchwork quilt for a friend's daughter's wedding this week.  The patchwork itself had been done - all by hand, mostly by my friend Jan, but also by a whole array of other people.

All that needed doing was the actual basting, quilting and edging.  I can honestly say it was a joy to do it - not only because I love doing this sort of thing, but also because I could feel the love in each stitch my machine crossed.  This object was imbued with love - it was literally stitched into it.  To hold something like that for a short time and have the privilege of bringing it to completion is not something you get to do very often and it was.....Heavenly.

I tucked my littlies into bed tonight, littlest without Teddy - who was lost as he often is - but never at bedtime.  I thought I could do it.  I thought I would be able to leave him as I listened from behind the bedroom door to his smallest and most disappointed voice saying "where Teddy gone?"  No, I couldn't do it.  Off out into the garden  for one last look and after climbing into several bushes, found Teddy and was able to reunite the two of them for restful sleep.  Some Things are just too special to be without.

Brighter. Better.

Hello Lovelies.  This is going to be a short little post to say thank you for all the concern and thoughtfulness following my last blog post.  I feel the corner has been turned and I have a few tools in my hands for the task ahead.  Sometimes that's all you need, isn't it?  Someone to hand you the right tools - not to do the job for you , because they can't.  But to care enough to seek out the tools they have to pass on to you.

 

 

My little companion whilst I was making things this week.

Busy working on these this week.

I am blessed with some truly creative and generous friends who over the last few days have bestowed encouragement and practical support on me.  Thank you people, you know who you are. xx

A new teddy to add the the growing family on Reu's bed!  Our birthday present to him.

I have had a couple of days mixing making with the daily activities of feeding, cleaning and washing, mothering.  But it's been a good couple of days and I feel I am carrying it a little lighter.

Noah tucking "Dewey" into his sleeping bag.  A regular bedtime ritual.

A colour theme emerging...A specially commissioned Bra rucksack for a Pink Ribbon walk, new Yoyo crochet hair clips and yummy chocolates, which were a thank you for the bag!

 I just thought I'd share that with you anyway.  I'm off now to make another embroidered ring - think it's going to be a snail this time......